Harry Potter: The Untold Truth
by Splashpaw
Summary: We all know that witches and wizards in Harry Potter were people, but what if they weren't? What if they were animals instead? I don't own Harry Potter or Warriors. Rated T just in case.
1. Chapter 1

**Okay, so no pointing out the obvious! This is a funny story I wrote when I was A LOT younger and I just fixed it up. I know this isn't how anything turned out, and it may be a little unrealistic, but no making fun of me ok? xD  
**

**I had this idea and couldn't resist writing it all down.****The characters aren't people. We thought of these names before we read Harry Potter, just to make it clear, Lily Evans and Lily are NOT the same person.**

**Warning: this may seem childish to those who have never played like this. I'll give you a list if unfamiliar characters- ones that were never in the books, never existed-to help you:**

**Tiger & Tigerpaw(identical tigers obviously) *males***

**Misty(F)**

**Toby(M) and Holly(F)**

**Leafkit(F)****  
**

**Karma(F)**

**Jaykit(M)**

**Cute(F)**

**Kiki(F)**

**Lionkit(M)**

**Hollykit(F)  
**

**Squirrel(M. A squirrel obviously)**** and****Lynx(name**** states her animal type. F)  
**

**Bradford and Dick(both male. Weasles.)**

**Joe(this dumb cat we made up. M)  
**

**Lily and Jane(Fs)**

**Komodo Dragon(M)**

**And many others, but I got tired. Oh and one more thing. Some of the characters have names from the books, but they aren't the same characters .  
**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and Warriors or the characters or anything except the plot and OCs.  
**

**You have been warned.. Oh and this doesn't start off in Hogwarts. Guess I have to clarify that.**

* * *

Joe woke up at five a.m. and ran screaming into the living room. "Tiger!" he screamed, jumping like he was bleeding to death. "Someone come here quick!"

He walked into the basement where Tiger and Tigerpaw kept a bunch of drums and noisemakers. He found a bullhorn and started screaming. "WAKE UP!" Tigerpaw and Tiger woke up from their beds in the basement.

"Joe is in big trouble if there's not something wrong," Tiger said.

Tigerpaw giggled. "Thornclaw will flatten him like a piece of paper."

Their mother woke up. "What is it Joe?" she asked,getting up fast. Tiger heard her coming downstairs.

"I rolled off the bed and broke my leg!" Joe screeched. "It hurts!"

Tigerpaw climbed off the bed and his brother followed. They snuck into the next part of the basement and came into the noise-room just in time to see her storming up the stairs. Tiger and Tiger hid behind the boxes and just a second after they hid, in stomped Thornclaw.

"Joe," he said, "What happened?"

"I rolled off the bed and broke my leg," whined Joe. The twins snickered and Thornclaw looked as if he were going to explode.

"That's too bad," he said slowly. "Joe" he leaned forward, "Tell me, how did you manage to walk downstairs with a broken leg?"

Joe giggled. "I.. ah.. I hopped down the stairs on one leg" He nodded as if that cleared everything.

"You don't have a broken leg," Thornclaw growled. "You broke one last year and you couldn't walk at all."

"Actually I do, look at my feet. My legs are broken" Joe stomped his feet. Tigerpaw laughed silently. If Joe's leg had been broken he certainly wouldn't be stomping his feet.

Thornclaw exploded at that point. "YOU DON'T HAVE A BROKEN LEG! GET BACK UPSTAIRS AND DON'T GET OUT OF BED UNTIL BREAKFAST. IF I HEAR SO MUCH AS A PEEP, YOU WON'T LIVE TO SEE THE NEXT FIVE SECONDS OF YOUR LIFE. SO GET BACK UPSTAIRS. NOW!" he yelled and Joe nodded hurriedly and scurried upstairs as if Thornclaw was going to carry out his word right there and then.

* * *

"..Late...Hollykit, Lionkit, Bradford, and Dick, you're late.. Cute, Jaykit.. You're late as well.. Anyway, I'll give you your test results at the end of today's lesson.. You can start now," the teacher said while Joe started making retching noises before preceding to make a scene of throwing up all over his desk.

"Joe, that's disgusting, you know that, right?" asked Misty. Joe made no sign that he had heard her.

"I can't stay in school," he said, "I'll just take my test home to my mother, she'll read it and send you a letter," he choked. Leafclaw walked over to his desk. "Fine, we'll get you home," she said, "and I hope you get better soon."

"Wasn't that a little too obvious?" Toby hissed as she left with Joe.

"Wasn't what a little too obvious?" asked Misty. Toby shook his head. "No, Leafclaw. I can't get why she never noticed_ that_." He pointed at the can of Naked juice sitting on Joe's desk. Tiger shrugged.

"Yeah, Leafclaw will let him go. Even if he was spitting Naked juice all over his desk."

"Are you sure Leafclaw would let it pass?"

"Oh yeah. She's blind to all his faults. Even blind to that can of juice. I guess it does look a bit like vomit, being all thick and viscous and all but if he really wanted to play a prank he should've hid the can." Tigerpaw giggled. "It'll be all our fault. Yeah, she'll say we forced it down his throat or something."

"He just knows for a fact she'll believe him every second- oh, um, hi, Leafclaw," said Lynx nervously. "We were just talking about, uhh, Joe being sick and having to vomit in front of us all is terrible." Squirrel nodded. "Yeah that's right, we feel sorry for him," he added.

"Well, get to work, you're not sick!" she snapped. "Joe must be sad to miss out his lesson. It's his favourite, you know."

"What, studying termites?" one of the Tigers asked under his breath.

"Yes, Tiger! Studying termites is my favourite thing to do as well! We'll be studying termites today, because it's the last day of school."

"I'm not Tiger I'm Tigerpaw," Tigerpaw said.

"Whatever the heck your name is," Leafclaw said, "We are learning about termites Tiger, and it is a very important subject- Hollykit, wake up or I'll make you sit in one of those strapped- straight-backed chairs- that should keep you awake. I want you-"

The bell rang. Leafclaw cursed violently at the sound and then changed her sentence."I mean, I want you to all research termites and turn them in tomorrow- Friday afternoon.."

"Oh, this is going to be are so awesome..." grumbled Misty.

"What's the stupid obsession with termites anyway? Didn't we read about them before anyways?" Hollykit mewed.

"Can't remember which one," replied Tigerpaw. "We could just find our old paper, I guess.. Might take a while though. I wonder what Thornclaw will say will say when he finds out we're researching termites."

"I wonder who'll be joining us this summer," Tiger said.

* * *

**Here you'll meet two wonderful just-so-Mary-Sues:  
**

Lily and Jane had traveled to and visited probably every place in the U.K now. They were probably the two of the laziest people on the planet. They had no intention of going to the U.S. now, because they were rich in the U.K, and had somehow convinced their mother never to go back.

"Something wonderful is going to happen today, you'll go away for a year and leave the house in peace," she said one day. Lily and Jane had no idea what surprise it was.. until they got their letters that announced what their mother had meant by a year's break.

**A/N: Yeah they're spoiled brats, but ever so fun to use- and make them do stupid things. They were like this since we ever played a game with stuffed animals: made up BEFORE I started reading chapter-stories, so they're not based on anyone. I have them doing something really dumb for the next chapter. Ok not the next chapter but later in this story..  
**

**...**

After handing in the papers the next afternoon, after Kiki came over to see Cute Tigerpaw and Tiger asked Blackclaw if they could come over to visit Cute and Jay. Tiger thought it must be his luckiest day in his entire life, because almost nobody bought it that he was coming to play a game.

Despite that, he did come over to play a game- a game that Kiki and Cute thought was one of the worst games that had ever been played in history- and a game that Tiger and Tiger thought was the best game that had been played in history**(no game, not even Quidditch- which they know already because they already went. You'll see why in a few moments) **. Every time Tiger and Tigerpaw came over, Cute and Kiki tore every place apart looking for a place to hide.

So on that particular day, they took the worst hiding place they could possibly have chosen: the refrigerator. Right next to the for the twins that Jay and Cute's parents never bothered to find out what was going on in the kitchen when they played.

Tiger and Tigerpaw came in as usual. Jay took them in at the door, since he didn't have anything to do in the game anyway. "Hi guys."

"Hey, Jay, do you know where Cute and Kiki went?" asked Tiger.

"No idea," Jaykit replied and went outside to play trucks in the mud. Tigerpaw and Tiger began their search.

They acted like they were stalking a crime, which Blackclaw and Nightwing thought was part of the game, which they assumed to be hide-and-go-seek. So they let them search everywhere where Cute and Kiki were allowed to hide.  
They finished their upstairs search in the bathroom. "Well Tiger, I don't think they're here" Tigerpaw said. "Let's check downstairs. Anyways that's where the refrigerator is and I'm thirsty."

Downstairs they went- and into the kitchen, where they halted at the refrigerator, opened the door and took out some milk. They then went to precede with the game, but unfortunately Kiki had decided she was tired of sitting cramped in the drawer at the bottom all scrunched up, and so had Cute. They broke the drawer to get out- and that sound made Tiger check what was hiding in the refrigerator.

"What was that?" asked Tigerpaw as he followed his brother over to the refrigerator. Tiger beat him to it.

"Hello," he said cheerfully. "I was afraid I would never find you. TIGERPAW COME HERE QUICK! I FOUND THE TWO COOKIES FOR THE GAME!" Tigerpaw reached him as he finished his sentence- and the game began with the twins screaming "COOKIES" like they had gone insane.

**Brief time skip:**

Tiger caught Cute and Tigerpaw caught Kiki. Then they dragged them back into the kitchen, where they had the oven at 375 degrees Fahrenheit and some cookies. Then he put them on a cookie pan with the real cookies and baked them like cookies for three minutes. When they came out the twins would be running after them at top speed and caught them again and took back his cookies and ate them. Kiki and Cute took no time getting to the sink and sitting in freezing water for twenty minutes.

And that was pretty much that until the next time they decided to come over.

* * *

**Cute's POV( two days later):  
**

"What the- how did you manage to manage to get someone to write to you?" asked Jaykit, snatching the envelope from her.

"Why anyone would write to _you_ doesn't connect my system; I know we do the same things Jay, but you're not like - well, never mind, we're both just as bad," she replied, snatching it back and tearing it open. "Anyway, looks like it's for both of us."

"Yeah,_ riiiiiight_," Jaykit said, dragging the word_ right_out longer than it needed to. Cute watched as his gaze slide over the envelope and felt her own heartbeat speed up as she scanned it herself.

"Um.. did you do something that would make someone want to play some dumb joke on us?" she asked.

"No," he responded. She nodded. "Yeah, neither have I. Except when er.. you smashed a lightbulb without touching it. And, um, I never told you before but Tiger bakes me in the oven" she giggled

He stared for a moment before replying, "What in the world is Hogwarts?"**  
**

* * *

**What do you think?**


	2. Chapter 2: Platform 9 and three-quarters

******A/N/U: I looked in the book we wrote and apparently Jay's name is Jaykit.. at first anyways. I forgot to mention something else, the characters are all animals. Here's the next chapter. But first, let me answer your reviews!**

**jayfeather12345: 1) **Yeah, so do I... And just to let you know, the Tiger twins have this A-1sauce episode as well when Toby burned up the A-1 sauce... That was funny too. I checked up and they got in trouble in the kitchen.. Well, you'll just have to find out. **2) **Joe is going to be stupid too.. He reads this book which we invented a title for- but I won't spoil it, it's really funny when he uses it to defend himself.. **3)** Lots of trouble, especially when they want to bake cookies *cough* Cute *cough* Kiki*cough* in the kitchen.

**Amberflame805: **Thank you! Your story is really random and funny too, I laughed the whole story through, it was hilarious! XD

**I just wanted to say something, this is time-skipped to where they are getting their stuff(wands/books, etc), because I didn't write about them going to Gringotts, and I'm too lazy to do it. If you have any other questions, PM me and I'll try to clear it up C=**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Warriors or Harry Potter; they are owned by J.K Rowling and Erin Hunter(s).**

* * *

"Did you see their faces when they got the letters? They were absolutely shocked," whispered Tiger.

"Yeah, but it's weird, cause Cute and Jaypaw's parents are wizard and witch too. It's just weird- look there they are," Tigerpaw broke off. "Hi Cute, what's up? What are you here for?"

Cute and Kiki were so shocked they dropped whatever they were holding, while Jay acted as though his sister was invisible. Obviously he wished his sister hadn't brought Kiki along.

"What are you doing here?" she shot back. "Checking out books obviously." Tigerpaw shrugged. "So am I, what's the problem?" Cute bristled.

"Tigerpaw, have you ever heard of _biscuits_?" she asked in a whisper. Jaypaw sniggered.

"What-oh, uh, yeah," Tiger muttered. If Nightwing or Blackclaw were here, he certainly didn't want them to find out about him baking their daughter in the oven. Jaypaw was staring at them as if his sister had never told him about the cookie game.

"Good," muttered Cute. "I don't think Blackclaw would be happy if he knew you were baking-"

"Were baking what?"

Blackclaw was directly behind them. Tigerpaw stared at Cute. However angry she had been about the oven fiasco, he and his brother both knew she hadn't intended him to know they were crisping her in the oven for ten seconds.

"Cookies," Tiger mewed. Blackclaw acted like he hadn't spoken at all.

"Baking _what_, Cute?" he repeated.

"Cookies," she mumbled, not looking at him. "Like Tigerpaw said."

"I'm not Tigerpaw, I'm Tiger," whined Tiger. Blackclaw ignored him. "Good. So long as there's nothing wrong." Jaypaw stifled a snort of laughter.

"Yeah, right."

"Well, we're not staying here all afternoon are we?" asked Tigerpaw.

Jaykit shrugged. "Not up to me is it?"

"Well, we found the books you need.."

"Tiger you're a third year! You have third year books, not first year," Jaypaw said.

"Actually, Jaykit," Cute said, looking closer at the books Tigerpaw was carrying, "some of those books are what we need."

"Yeah, so take this already!" Tiger snapped. Jaykit uttered a swear word he never would have said if either Nightwing or Blackclaw- but especially Blackclaw- had been listening.

"Watch your mouth," Cute hissed at her brother as Blackclaw turned around. "If Blackclaw hears you saying that you won't make it out of the store."

"Yeah, you're probably right," said Jaykit without turning around. "Hey Tigerpaw," he said to Tiger, "Do they have anything at Hogwarts that we'll be able to.. Uh, play around with?"

One of the twins shrugged. "If you're gonna talk to him, use his proper name. It's me who is Tigerpaw, you know." Jaykit looked like Tigerpaw had shoved a box of toilet waste under his nose.

"Actually I don't, you're identical," he muttered while Blackclaw decided to find the last book on Jaykit and Cute's list.

"Oh wow," said Tiger -or Tigerpaw- they couldn't tell which. "We never noticed." Tigerpaw jumped and stared at his brother as if he had never noticed the look-alikes. "Hey Tiger- we're identical!"

Jaykit snorted, but it was Cute who answered. "Haha, very funny," she growled.

"Which one of us is which?"

"You're Tiger," she meowed, pointing at one of them. Jaykit shrugged , already bad-tempered. "Yeah, and that's Tigerpaw," he hissed.

"Wrong!" they yelled gleefully. Jaykit let out a hiss of annoyance that sounded suspiciously like a swear word.

"Jay, I'm warning you," hissed Cute, though she looked like she would have sworn if she wasn't worried about Blackclaw catching her.

"Yeah, listen to her and wash out your mouth, you don't want to be caught swearing," said Tiger while Jaykit looked like he would like to do nothing more than swear at the twins nonstop. Cute dragged him off as Nightwing called, "Come here! Your father and I aren't staying all day."

"Coming," Cute called, glaring at Jaykit, who was trying his hardest to stay rooted to the spot.

* * *

"How'd it go?" Tiger asked when the two came out of the wand store. Cute shrugged. Jaykit tried to pretend Tiger and Tigerpaw weren't there, but he didn't do much of a good job because when Cute ignored him he whispered, "You forgot about them baking cookies in the oven? _You_ were the one being baked, you know!"

"Shut up Jay, it's not like you haven't tried to do something like that with him," she snapped. He sighed. "But he's being annoying."

"Aren't we annoying when we put that thumbtack in Leafclaw's desk? I admit it, Jay, we're troublemakers, but you're stupid when you act like we never did anything troublesome."

Jaykit shrugged feeling most of the anger seep away. "True enough. Sorry Tiger." Tigerpaw stomped his foot. "Are we really that hard to tell apart?"

"Sorry then, Tigerpaw," he mewed. "Anyway what do you mean by 'how did it go'? "

"How many wands did you go through before you finally got one?" Tigerpaw asked with a grin.

"Jaykit went through fifty- seven million thirty zillion-quantillion-trillion-"

"And Cute went through a billion gazillion-"

"Imaginary numbers?" Tiger asked swiftly.

"What are you arguing about?" Stripes's voice broke in. Stripes was talking to Thornclaw about Joe's first year. "No doubt he'll be sick half the time," she was muttering.

"Yeah, but Spottedleaf is a good medicine cat. She'll be able to cure his illness or whatever- so don't count on him leaving," Tigerpaw said.

"Yeah," Tiger echoed his brother. "Don't count on it."

Just then they heard Joe's unmistakable whining. "But Holly and Toby were supposed to be joining us at platform nine-and-three-quarters, and now you say they're taking a Portkey."

"Maybe Leafshadow and Darkclaw have something more important than waiting for a first year student to sit around drooling on his books he wants to buy," growled Thornclaw. Tigerpaw and Tiger snorted with laughter.

"What's so funny?" Cute demanded.

The twins exchanged glances. "Didn't you hear Thornclaw?" Tiger and Tigerpaw both asked.

"Well, yeah, but we didn't get what he meant," Jaykit and Cute said in unison.

The twins let out a false cough. "Well, Joe was drooling all over his books. Wonder how happy the teachers will be if they ask to see his book. Maybe we'll tell that it got drowned in saliva."

"Yuck," Cute said. "He's stupid Tiger shrugged. "Yeah, well, Joe is stupid."

"You're right, he doesn't even know zero plus zero," agreed Cute.

"Leafclaw loves him so much she'd never expel him no matter how many tests he failed," Tiger said. "She gives him all the excuse she wants."

"They'll probably propose a wedding ceremony any day now," Tigerpaw interrupted.

"Leafclaw would be better off with him than anyone else," Tiger agreed. "If she weren't smart enough to teach she wouldn't be a teacher."

"She acts like Joe," said Cute. "Always 'Poor Joe, he's sick. Ohhh... Let's study termites to remember and honour his memory until he comes back'. Yeah, poor Joe."

"Let's not torture ourselves with the memory of Joe," said Cute, while Jaypaw wondered why she liked the twins better who had always cooked her in the oven.

"Tiger that was a bad idea," Toby said, "I think he was listening."

Tiger shrugged. "It's true."

"Yeah, true, but unless your parents don't mind name-calling, unlike mine," Holly said.

"Haha," Jaykit said. Thornclaw and Stripes were still hissing at each other- something about Joe's behaviour out in public and what they whould do to him about it, but the kits didn't even listen in on the conversation, obviously too boring compared to what was happening to them.

**...**

They arrived at the train station at half-past two. Lionkit and Hollykit, the twins' younger brother and sister, were getting tired of waiting. It wouldn't be until next year that they would be going. Now that they were finally there, Tigerpaw and Tiger's older brother and sister were ranting about something. Jaykit tried to catch what they were saying to Stripes and Thornclaw.

".. and listen, I've got to meet Finchflight at three, and if I don't get there soon, he'll suspect something's wrong," the pale tabby she-cat was mewing.

"That's great, Mistcloud," Stripes mewed. She licked her on the cheek. "Send me a letter when you get there." Her brother- a dark ginger tabby- nodded. "Yeah, we need to go,make them get going so we can get a move on."

She watched them go and turned around onto her twin kits and meowed to them in a warning tone, "Now you two behave yourselves this year, you hear me? If I receive one more owl about how you've...blown up a hallway- or a classroom- or one of the tables in the Great Hall or-or-or _something_..."

"Blown up a table in the Great Hall? What the heck do you mean?"

"We've never done that before. Thanks for the idea!"

"It's not funny, you two," Stripes- the dark ginger tabby she-cat- hissed. "Do your dear mother a favor and look after Leafkit while you're at school."

One of the twins ruffled the ginger she-cat's- fur with his paw and meowed in a teasing way, "Don't worry, Mum. Cutey-pie 'ittle bitty Leafkit will be safe with us!" Tiger sniggered. The ginger she-kit bristled.

"Shut up, mouse-brains, at least I don't pull out his book of cute things and play innocent if something bad happens."

"Mum," Hollykit broke in. "Mum, Lionkit needs to go make dirt."

"Oh dear," Stripes mewed. "Hurry up," she ordered. Thornclaw was glaring at Joe, who was still acting like an overgrown kit and staring at his book bag like he had never seen one in all his life."That means you too. And no arguing, I don't want to make a scene in front of these muggles!"

Nightwing nodded. "Cute, Jay, you've got mud all over you. I'm _kind of_ shocked that no one noticed you. But that's fine, I'll take care of it." Cute bristled.

"Mum, we don't mind being dirty.."

"We play in it all the time, there's nothing wrong with it."

"You're not going to go to Hogwarts and get your apprentice name like that, they do have a naming ceremony, you know." (**A/N: Yes they have naming ceremonies for the cats with warrior names. Just so you know, we played Clan cats a lot too. Also, I'm well aware that Mindy was changed to Leafkit. It just didn't seem to match.) **Nightwing sounded tired of arguing. "And I don't want you acting up either. There are times when you have to listen. If Blackclaw was here right now he'd make it clear to you, now off you go!"

The two kits paused. "We'll have plenty of time to do it before we get into the school. We promise we won't make a scene." Nightwing shrugged. "Oh, alright," she meowed, fixing them with her green gaze. "Just mind you clean yourself properly."

"We will," promised the kits. Nightwing purred and gave them a lick on the cheek. "Good."

Jaykit turned his attention back to the Tiger twins, where Joe was whining that he didn't have a necktie like the muggles running around the station. "I need one so I look nice," he whined.

"Don't be ridiculous, Joe," snapped Stripes, "how stupid do you think you look with one of them on? Off you go." She nudged Joe towards the barrier, where he sulkily left through.

"Off you go Leafkit," said Tiger and Tigerpaw, and the ginger-furred she-cat hurried towards the barrier, dragging her bag along on the ground as she did so.

"Mummy, we really need to make dirt," Hollykit mewed. "Can we leave somewhere now?" Thornclaw jerked his head around from glaring at where Joe had been standing before. "You'll just have to wait." He turned to glare at the Tigers and Leafkit. "Get moving!" he barked. "We shoudln't have to wait all day!"

Leafkit looked scared for a second; then she hurried through the barrier as though a dog were after her.

"That was funny," Tiger mewed.

"Yeah," agreed Tigerpaw but as soon as he caught Thornclaw's expression he said, "C'mon let's go. We don't want to get our head chucked with a log remember?"

"Oops yeah," meowed Tiger before following Tigerpaw through the barrier with their luggage.

Jaykit and Cute went next. To Jaykit it was weird to go towards it and not crash into the wall.

**Time skip- I didn't write anything about getting on the train, just what happened while they were on it sooo.. back to the story.**

**...**

"Jay, did you bring anything to eat?"

It was about four 'o clock, and the kits were getting hungry. Jaykit shrugged. "No, I- wait, lemme dig through the stuff we got for the first Potions class, there might be something edible in there."

"Like what? Dried beetles?" Cute asked sarcastically. Jaykit snorted.

"Well.. maybe there's something else in here. I'm not talking about gross stuff."

"Eww, maybe dead fish," said Cute, wrinkling her nose. Jaykit was opening his ingredients up when the door to the compartment opened and two giggling she-cats came in.

"Oh- hello, you two!" they squealed. Cute's nose wrinkled even more.

"Who told you to come in here?" she growled. "Please tell me, because Jaykit and I didn't invite you."

The two she-cats stopped giggling. "No one told us _not_ to come in here," the very light-brown she-cat mewed. The reddish tabby twitched her tail. "Yeah, That's true Jane."

"Listen, you two, Lily's completely right. we can stay if we want," the pale brown tabby said.

"So long as you keep your mouth shut," Cute meowed.

The she-cats ignored her. "Ooh, are you taking out your stuff already?" the reddish tabby called Lily asked.

"No," Jaykit mewed flatly. "Now shut your mouth and go away."

"Here, we'll show you our stuff," Lily and Jane both meowed. Cute made a face. "And then can you leave?" she meowed. Jaykit nodded. "Yeah, show us and then go away," he mewed.

"Yes, yes, of course," they purred. "Anyway, if you've got your Potions ingredients correctly, you should have this," Jane said, pulling out a bag of something that looked an awful lot like crushed lightbulbs. After she had emptied her ingredients, accompanied by the lightbulbs, were some shredded paper, melted plastic, orange peels, and some plastic bags.

"I need to make dirt," Cute said automatically. "So do I," said Jaykit, not bothering to tell Cute he wasn't sure if the there were bathrooms on the train.

"Oh okay," said the two she-cats and collapsed into giggles again as they got up and dragged their stuff away.

"They're so stupid," whispered Cute as soon as they shut the door. "'We'll show you our stuff!' Honestly, she acts like we're big fans of her or something.. but anyway.. I can't wait to see what our Potions master will say about putting that stuff in their potion. Wonder if something interesting will happen."

**...**

**Time skip:**

"He or she'll go ballistic. Remember last time Lily and Jane were baby- sitters for Tiger and Tigerpaw and their siblings? They said they made something with the same ingredients.. Something tells me they'll try and sneak in the kitchen for some jalapeno peppers from the kitchen if they can."

"I don't dare to think what mess she'll make. Something's gonna smell like burning rubber," Cute meowed. Jaykit started to reply, when a loud voice interrupted them.

"This way, first years, follow me!"

"Who's that?" a gray she-cat meowed, staring into the darkness. "I dunno," meowed another.  
"Guess we'll have to follow the voice."

The first years stumbled into boats, and the growl sounded again, "C'mon! Any more first years? You'll get to see the castle in a few moments. Just follow me!"

The last of the first years clambered into the boats.

"T'ere should be no more than eigh' kits in one boat, hear me? No more than eigh' cats a boat!"

"Who's talking?" repeated the gray she-cat as Cute and Jaykit made a wild pounce into their boats.

"Dunno, ask whoever it is," replied Cute as she settled down. "I don't know."

"Is that all the firs' years?" the cat repeated gruffly. "Al righ', now just paddle these boats to shore. Ready?" he called. There was a murmur of assent from the kits.

Leafkit and a Siamese shorthaired kit joined them, followed by two weasles and Lynx and Squirrel. It was lucky they had joined them on their boat ride, because between all the comotion and their hunger, Jaykit and Cute had fallen asleep.

They had fallen into such a deep sleep that they didn't notice when they had reached the castle until Squirrel and Lynx prodded them in the side and told them they'd better get out unless they wanted to skip dinner and a place to sleep.

**A/N: Hope you liked it! I know I changed Mindy's name to Leafkit, but I didn't want to be copying from me and my brother's original book that says "Leafkit" and making typos the whole way through. Review and tell me what you think! Like it? Hate it? Tell me your thoughts! And I won't update until I get at least 3 more reviews. **

**Virtual cookies to anyone who can guess who the Siamese cat Leafkit had with her, and bonus points to anyone who makes a guess on who some of the others are as well(like that gray cat. One of the mass editing I did with this story is break the friendships at the beginning, I mean I had WAY too many. **

**Reviews are welcome- such as constructive criticism- which will will be used to roast these beef hotdogs we have in the freezer. And I like hotdogs, so you'd be doing me a favour!(Lame joke, I know, but I'm tired). **

**What do you think is going to happen? What will Lily and Jane do? What'll happen in Potions class? Only one way to find out! Review!  
**

**Oh, by the way , give me a point of view for the next one. I do have the book written, but one of the reasons it's bad is because there's no sense of feeling in it/POVs. **

**Bye!  
**


	3. Chapter 3: The Sorting Collar

**A/N: Hey guys! I'm back! Review replies..  
**

**Amberflame805: **Poor Tiger/paw. He should know what biscuits are, having baked them in the oven a hundred dozen times. Don't worry, this part is random. In my opinion anyways.

**Phoenix Oblivion: **She turns up in this chapter.. You'll see her more frequently in the next few though! Thanks! I'm updating now! Luckily you don't have to wait long!

**jayfeather12345**: **1)** This is Cute's POV! And thanks! **2) **It's Karma! **3**) I'll do that, in the next chapter though.. :D Thank you!

**Enjoy! Oh, and I wanted to say something, a few of the characters are from the book, but the rest belong to me.**

**Disclaimer:I don't own Harry Potter or Warriors; they are owned by J.K. Rowling and the Erin Hunters.**

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**The Sorting Collar**

Cute stared around as she followed the cat into the castle. Inside the castle, it was brighter than it had been outdoors, although the light from the half-moon had brightened the clearing considerably well.

"These 're the firs' years," said the cat. A tabby stood in front of them.

Cute didn't listen to half of what she was saying; she had the impression Jaykit wasn't either, he was too busy sniggering at something Tigerpaw had said to him.

Tiger and Tigerpaw were muttering something against ten top tests you had to do before you could become a student, and Lynx and Squirrel were saying it had to do with kittypet things, and Cute was wondering what things it had concerning them-although she had nothing against them.

Jaykit was staring at a tabby she-cat; he leaned towards her and whispered, "What's that white thing she has? What's it for?"

Cute glanced at the tabby she-cat, the thing she was holding seemed to be any color but white. It was a muddy brown, and it seemed as if some cat had tried to fight it. Aloud she mewed, "I dunno. Maybe they tried to take it from a dog."

"A likely story," said Jaykit, his eyes narrowed.

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Tiger and Tigerpaw trying not to laugh. They had to stuff there paws into their mouth to keep quiet; Cute was getting the impression that they were laughing at her.

"What's so funny?" she demanded. Tiger shrugged. "Nothing."

"I assume nothing is the collar over there," mewed Cute. The twins stopped laughing, and Tiger shrugged. "Yeah, well, so would you if you found a collar that's all scratched up like that. It _sings_."

"Sings?" echoed Cute, staring over at the ragged collar. "Sings what?"

"The 'dancy dancy dance' song Joe sang last year at the table?" Leafkit asked, breaking into the conversation.

"You'll see," said Tigerpaw. "It'll give you a clue on what you have to do about the angry dogs you have to fight." Cute stared at him.

"Keep your mouth shut and listen, it won't sing the song twice," added Tiger.

Cute stared at the ragged and dirtied collar, feeling extremely stupid; beside her, Squirrel and Lynx muttered something about the twins being ridiculous. She caught something about "-how stupid it would be to have us fighting-we might not even come out alive".

Cute was having the impression tat it was another joke Tiger and Tigerpaw had played, but she couldn't understand how the teachers hadn't caught them, so it must be a part of their tradition. Her thoughts seemed jammed up in confusion; Tiger and Tigerpaw were still trying to muffle their snorts of laughter. Leafkit turned her attention back.

_Oh, you may not think I'm pretty,_

_But don't judge what you see,_

_I'll strangle myself if you can find_

_A smarter collar than me._

_You can keep your paw pads pink or black,_

_Your ears sleek and-or tall,_

_For I'm the Hogwarts Sorting Collar,_

_And I can top them all._

_There's nothing hidden in your head_

_The Sorting Collar can't see,_

_So fit me on your neck and I will tell you_

_Where you ought to be._

_You might belong in Gryffindor,_

_Where dwell the brave at heart,_

_Their daring, spirit,nerves, and chivalry,_

_Set those lions apart,_

You might belong in Hufflepuff,

_Where they are just and loyal,_

_Those patient badgers are true_

_And unafraid of toil;_

_Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,_

_If you've got a ready mind,_

_Where those birds of wit and learning,_

_Will always find their kind;_

_Or perhaps in Slytherin_

_You'll make your real friends,_

_Those cunning snakes use tricks of any means_

_To achieve their ends._

_So fit me around your neck! Don't be shy!_

_And don't get in a scare_

_You're in safe paws(though I have none)_

_For I'm the Sorting Collar!_

Cute watched as the collar went silent. The tabby took a scroll of parchment and began shouting out names at random.

"When I call your name, you will come sit here and put the collar on to be sorted," the tabby meowed."Karma Stumpytail!" she barked. Cute was a little surprised that her last name was Stumpytail; Karma left Leafkit, mutterung, "A collar? Is that all? I thought we'd have to fight or something!"

Leafkit, her friend, shrugged and stared as the Siamese Shorthair skidded to a halt beside the tabby, who gave her the collar; Karma shoved it on.

Moments later it yowled out her House."HUFFLEPUFF!"

Karma padded back to Leafkit. "I wonder if they have a sort of exercise," she meowed as she sat down again. "I could never last even a month without some kind of exercise."

"I bet they do," Leafkit muttered. "They probably know we'd go mad without free time for a year." Cute sniggered. "The teachers would die from lack of it.."

"Good," Karma said, leaving them free to listen to the cats being called.

"Kiki Stumpytail!"

"SLYTHERIN!"

So Kiki was Karma's sister,about her age. She jerked her head back around while the deputy called "Leafkit!"

Leafkit took ten minutes before the Sorting Collar announced her the first Gryffindor.

She was followed by "Bluekit" -a small gray cat who took double Leafkit's time- who turned out to be a Ravenclaw- and "Joe" -Leafkit's brother who turned out to be a Gryffindor.

Cute was almost asleep when Jaykit told her that he'd be quite happy if she skipped dinner and gave him whatever fish she planned on having.

"Oh no, I think I like fish too much," she said while "Bradford Angier" and "Dick Angier" were made Hufflepuffs.

"Misty!"

"GRYFFINDOR!"

"Tom Brown!" The tabby shouted.

"RAVENCLAW!"

"Rick Brown!" she continued.

"RAVENCLAW!"

"I don't get why it made those idiots Ravenclaws; they're not exactly smart," Cute hissed at Jaykit.

"They're not quite as dumb as Joe and Lily and Jane," Jaykit responded.

As though on cue, the deputy called out Lily and Jane's names.

It took the Sorting Collar ten minutes to decide they belonged in Slytherin; most Slytherins looked like they wanted like nothing more than to go to a different House.

"And I don't blame them, those two are total idiots. They're going to make lightbulb soup," said a voice behind Cute; Tiger and Tigerpaw were staring with interest at the dirty collar.

"What's lightbulb soup? Never heard of it," Cute mewed.

"Nobody eats it, but she cooks it for supper anyway even though she knew it wasn't edible," said Tigerpaw dully.

"Why? She's not your mother," Jaykit mewed. Tiger and Tigerpaw shrugged.

"Stripes thinks that they're better babysitters than anyone else . And she's partly right; the rest sit and do stupid things all night," Tiger snapped.

A gray-and-white she-cat joined Kiki in Slytherin. Cute watched boredly as the deputy continued to shout out names.

"Crab Crabfoot!"

"SLYTHERIN!"

"Crowkit Snaketail!"

"SLYTHERIN!"

Cute shifted her paws as Jaykit yawned and the tabby she-cat called, "Toby!"

A black tom with white paws and a white blaze on his face and wide green eyes padded away from a she-cat who was identical to him except for the white blaze on her nose. The collar took about two minutes before it shouted, "GRYFFINDOR!"

"Holly!"

The she-cat joined her brother a moment later in Gryffindor. Cute's left paw was starting to fall asleep and Jaykit slumped beside her. Cute half-listened as the remaining cats were called:

"Badgerkit" and "Vixenkit" - two Hufflepuffs were followed by "Justin Finch- Fletchley"- a ginger tomcat who turned out to be a Hufflepuff, and "Viperkit Maximallian"-a Slytherin- was followed by two twin dark tabbies who followed.

When a tabby tom named "Neville Longbottom" was called, he took about fifteen minutes to be Sorted, and when the collar finally shrieked "GRYFFINDOR!" after a while of thinking, he went back to his seat with the collar still round his neck and had to race back to the deputy to give it to a stocky dark gray tomcat, who was sorted into Hufflepuff before giving it to Lightningkit, a gray-and-black tabby she-cat- "SLYTHERIN!" -who the gave it to her brother Icekit, who looked exactly like her-but ended up in Hufflepuff instead. Two tabbies followed. There were only six cats left now.

"Cute!"

As soon as the she-cat yelled her name Jaykit kicked her from behind as if he was certain she was sleeping while standing.

She padded over to put the collar on; the only thought in her mind was she'd go in any House as long as Jaykit turned out to be in it, and since the thought was still bothering her it wasn't much use- especially since she had no idea which House she was going to be in.

_There's plenty of bravery in this little heart of yours,_ hissed a little voice inside her head, _but you're far too cute-_ which at this Cute fought hard not to tear the collar off- _oh yes, well, you're also scared out of your wits sometimes, you'd do best in Ravenclaw with Tom and Rick... No, you wouldn't you would be such a dunce they'd send you to be re-Sorted, and the class would make fun of you..._ Cute was feeling quite annoyed at this point._And you want to be with your brother, this is mousebrained, I know nothing _yet_ about the House he'll be in.._"Stop messing around with me," Cute muttered._ You're so easy to place but you're not smart enough for Ravenclaw.. Alright, we'll send you to see how well you do in_ "GRYFFINDOR!" the collar shouted. Cute flung the collar off just as they tabby beside her shouted "Jaykit!"_  
_

Her brother stormed over to the deputy; Cute was almost certain he was furious for some reason, and her heart skipped a beat when after about ten minutes the collar started off "SLYTH"- but ended " -GRYFFINDOR!"

"What do you think you're doing?!" she snarled as he padded back to her looking like he had recieved a large fish steak for dinner. "You could've ended up in Slytherin if you didn't get a brain freeze or something at the last second-"

She was cut off as the deputy called "Sandkit!" who was sorted into Gryffindor, "Frostkit" a Slytherin, "Jason" and a dark brown called Nightkit- a Hufflepuff.

As the collar shouted the last name, the pale tabby picked it up and gave it to an owl, who flew off with it with a loud hooting.

"It's time for dinner," said the tabby as she padded out of the room and Jaykit gave a crazy jump and yelled, "About time!" Tigerpaw said he hoped there was nothing but steak and A1 sauce.

Tiger and Tigerpaw stared after the pale tabby, both muttering something under their breath. Cute caught a glimpse of Toby grimacing at him when the deputy returned. This time though, another cat was with her.

"Dinner is ready," she meowed. The gray she-cat beside her nudged her aside.

"Before we eat, I will preform the naming ceremony," she meowed. "Some of you have the -kit at the end of your name." Jaykit let out a hiss of annoyance. "But there are loads of cats! It'll take all night!"

Cute sighed. "Yeah," she said. "I hope it's quick."

Jaykit made a derisive noise. "Sure it'll be quick. It'll be so fast we'll be eating the walls out of hunger." Tigerpaw snorted.

"Stop complaining. Don't forget me and Tiger had to wait out this before . When it was first year. And we had to wait two hours. So you're lucky, there aren't that many cats this time with names ending in -kit."

"Just as long as they bring the steak and A1 sauce," said Tiger with a grin. Jaykit made a violent gesture across his throat.

"If you don't ask for it tonight, I'll give you everything I own," he said. Tigerpaw laughed.

"A1 sauce and steak is better. Leave us alone, Jaykit." Cute saw him make a rude paw gesture, and could barely suppress a laugh when Tiger smacked him across the face.

"Leafkit," the gray she-cat mewed. The young ginger she-cat rushed forward. "From this moment on until you receive your full name you will be known as Leafpaw."

"Crowkit," she continued, "from this moment on until you receive your full name you will be known as Crowpaw. Badgerkit!" she barked, and a stocky black-and-white she-cat rushed forward, followed by a fluffy ginger she-kit.

"From this moment on until you receive your full name you will be known as Badgerpaw. Vixenkit," she continued, "from this moment on until you receive your full name you will be known as Vixenpaw."

"Viperkit, Lightningkit, Icekit," she mewed, in Cute's opinion deciding she couldn't be bothered to go on on at a time, "from this moment on until you three receive your full names you will be known as Viperpaw, Lightningpaw, and Icepaw. Sandkit, Frostkit, and Nightkit, from this moment on until you receive your full names you will be known as Sandpaw, Frostpaw, and Nightpaw. Thistlekit, Bluekit, and Jaykit, from this moment on until you recieve your warrior names you will be known as Thistlepaw, Bluepaw, and Jaypaw. " The gray she-cat rolled up the list of the names. "That's all."

"Yay," Jaypaw mewed. "How wonderful."

The cats were all crowded around the tables. Tiger and Tiger were looking at it as if something was missing something important, and Cute heard Tiger hiss, "Where's the steak and A1 sauce?"

"There's no steak and no A1 sauce," said Thistlepaw, grabbing a big red salmon steak and biting into it. "At least, not the steak you want."

Tiger and Tigerpaw looked like they would like to hit Thistlepaw, but they held back from the pale tabby she-cat and mewed calmly, "why not?"

"Because Joe just told Mistystar that you planned on puking all over the table when you saw it," Thistlepaw replied. Tigerpaw snorted contemptuously.

"Wow, we've been coming here for three years and I never did something disgusting like that. How did he know we'd do it tonight of all nights?" Tiger growled. Thistlepaw shrugged.

"Wasn't my fault," she snapped. Tigerpaw looked ready to explode. "Well, excuse me ThistlePAW, I have something to say to Joe. Where is he?"

Thistlepaw shrugged. "I dunno, over there maybe." She pointed with her tail towards a tom who was sitting with Sandpaw. Tigerpaw and Tiger sloped over to Joe.

"And did you see, I'm going to be a total favourite," Joe was saying. "Mistystar took away the A1 sauce and Tiger and Tiger are boiling-"

"Hi, Joe," Tiger said suddenly. Joe slopped soup all over the table. Sandpaw snorted into his food.

"What's the stinking problem?" he snapped. Tigerpaw shrugged. "What's so funny about Mistystar taking away the A1 sauce?"

"Who says I asked her to take it?!" Joe asked nervously. Cute choked on the bread she was eating.

"Says me," said Tigerpaw, "and Tiger. And Thistlepaw said so too."

"You drink it!" Joe said. "Like it's some special drink! It's not!"

"Oh I wasn't aware I was hurting you drinking it," said Tiger. At the Hufflepuff table, Bradford and Dick started a round of laughter. Cute leaned closer, accidentally kicking Jaypaw as she did so, not minding his hissing until he yanked her tail. Leafpaw giggled as Cute gave a startled jump.

"What are you doing?" she mewed. Jaypaw turned on her with an annoyed expression on his face. "None of your darn business!"

Joe shrugged. "Drinking A1 sauce is disgusting, and that's why I lied to Mistystar. She'd be-"

Tiger and Tigerpaw seemed to have reached the end of their patience; Tigerpaw had pulled out his wand and blasted Joe's bowl to smithereens and Tiger smashed his drink on the table. Joe's soda spilled all over the table.

"What the heck's going on over there?" Mistystar's deputy snarled, padding over to Joe and the twins. Cute tried not to laugh as Joe, covered in soda and soup, pointed at Tiger and Tigerpaw. Jaypaw spit out his soda on the table and Thistlepaw dropped her fish.

"It was all their fault," Joe was complaining. "They blew up my dinner."

"Yeah, like you didn't blow up ours," Tiger mewed. Tigerpaw nodded. "Yeah, he told Mistystar a big fat lie so she wouldn't_"

"Shut up your mouth," Joe snapped.

"I'll be quiet if you-"

"Stop it, both of you!" the tabby hissed angrily. "Joe, I heard that bit about Tiger and Tigerpaw, and it's none of your business what he likes to eat. No more interferences... and I'm also wondering how you managed to convince Mistystar the Tigers were planning on spitting on the table-"

Cute snorted into her soda, while Jaypaw absently grabbed the tin of biscuit porridge and took a bite of it. All of the cats at the tables were staring at the fight with Tiger and Tiger, Joe, and the tabby she-cat.

"-and if I hear any more of this nonsense I'll make you go scrub the bedpans in the hospital wing, and that's from either of you," she growled.

"Yes Snappy," Joe said disrespectfully; the tabby looked like she would like nothing more than to hit him across the face.

"My name is not Snappy," she hissed. Joe looked like he had just done something terribly wrong. "I'm sorry! Don't be mad at me please don't!" he cried.

"Nice try," whispered Cute. Jaypaw was still acting like he was playing a game; the tabby was yelling something at Joe before he broke in and said "In the book about _How to be Cuddly and Cute_ it says to always apologise after you say something rude" at which point Tiger and Tigerpaw hurried back to their seats. The pale tabby stomped off after telling Joe to fix his bowl.

Cute risked a glance at Joe, who was hissing at the cat next that he thought everyone should learn to accept that he was spoiled.

"Did Stripes ever spoil him?" she asked. Tiger rolled his eyes. "Do you think so?"

"No, she keeps yelling at him that he should go live out in the wild because he's too spoiled," Leafpaw mewed. "She says she wonders who spoiled him so badly."

"Ask Leafclaw," muttered Tigerpaw; Leafpaw looked away quickly and Tiger broke in, "Oh who cares if she has the same name Leafpaw? You're not the same cat, and I doubt you'll get the same name."

"Would you be quiet, some of us are trying to eat," Mistcloud snapped before going back to talk loudly with her brother again.

"Oh that's nice," huffed Leafpaw.

"Mistcloud," whined Joe loudly, "Mistcloud, someone made dirt in my food."

"Potty-mouth," Thistlepaw muttered. Cute nodded and gulped down the rest of her fish.

"Looks like Joe missed dinner," Leafpaw whispered quietly, pointing at Joe, who was glaring down at his empty bowl. "It's time for dessert now."

"That was me," Tigerpaw said. "I smashed his bowl. He was asking for it."

"It's not broken anymore," Leafpaw pointed out.

"That's because she fixed it for him," said Tiger. Cute shrugged and took a bowl of pudding. Jaypaw was busy crumbling his chocolate chip biscuits in a bowl and dumping milk sauce on top of it.

"That's disgusting," Joe said, dribbling vanilla pudding down his front. Thistlepaw glanced at him. "I don't know why you tell everyone they're disgusting when you do disgusting things yourself," she mewed. Joe gave her a very dirty look. Jaypaw ingored them both and put a straw in his mouth and sucked up a little of Cute's pudding.

"If you've finished eating, you can eat mine, Jaypaw," Cute yawned but before she could say anything else, Mistystar called, "Bedtime! Prefects, lead the first years to their House common rooms.."

Mistcloud and Oakfur barged past the first years as soon as she said this; Firestorm and Mistcloud were at the beginning of the line, shouting out their orders bossily and acting as if they owned the hallway leading to the common room.

The lead the yawning first years up a few staircases, and Cute had lost feeling in her forepaw when Mistcloud and Firestorm led them into a hallway which seemed like a dead end, where a picture of an extremely fat she-cat was snoozing.

"I'll wake her up," Mistcloud mewed. Tiger and Tigerpaw squeezed through the two prefects after whispering that there was no way Firestorm and Mistcloud were going to wake up the fat kitty.

"This is how you do it," Tiger mewed; his twin nodded and they both yelled, "WAKE UP!" at the top of their voice. The fat cat awoke with a jump, and Cute was vaguely aware of Firestorm and Mistclodu yelling that if they ever saw them doing something like that again, they'd give them detention; although Cute didn't think it seemed to bother them much.

"Password?" demanded the fat cat sleepily.

"Prefects are idiots," said Tiger promptly.

"Nice try, move over," snarled Firestorm and he and Mistcloud shoved the twins out of the way.

"Mouse droppings," Mistcloud said curtly.

"Whatever," the fat cat yawned, though she wrinkled her nose as she swung open to admit them.

Mistcloud and Firestorm led the she-cats and tomcats into two separate dormitories; too tired to sit around talking all night, Cute stumbled through the she-cats' dormitory and into a nest, catching Jaypaw's annoyed glance that he shot her as they fell asleep.

**A/N: That's all for this week. I'll see if I can't get the next chapter up by May 25th. Hope you enjoyed! **


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